Don't Worry, Be Happy: Year Theme Revisited

Following the tradition of a friend of mine, I started coming up with themes for the year on my birthday. This year's theme is Don't Worry, Be Happy. As I sat in the meeting for graduating seniors yesterday, in which they told us how to look for positions that are available and that we need to apply to graduate by December, I had to force myself to hold onto this theme. With each passing day, I am becoming more and more anxious about what life holds once I am handed my diploma on May 19. I have made contact with one church asking what sorts of material they would like from applicants, but am still waiting to hear back. I feel completely unequipped to be looking for jobs, let alone having a job. Time has moved way too quickly. I don't think I'm ready for real life to begin. Can I just stay in school a few more years, please?

And yet, I know that I don't want to be in school anymore. I want to be in the real world. I want to be doing something practical, to be doing the things for which I have been preparing during the past three years. Despite my feelings of being unequipped, I know that I am ready, that I have the skills and gifts necessary to do the things which I feel called to do (it's just a matter of convincing other people of that to get them to hire me). I think it was a slightly prophetic decision on my part to decide on "Don't Worry, Be Happy" as the theme for my 24th year. In many ways, this has been one of the most unsure years of my life and never before have I had to let go of worry as much as I have had over the past 7 months. I've come to realize worry won't get me anywhere. I can't worry my way into a job. In reality, worrying takes a lot more energy than sitting back and enjoying the ride. That is what I'll try to do. I'll put myself out there, send out resumes, make contacts, but I won't worry. Things will work out one way or another and if I ended living with my parents for a time while working at Starbucks, so be it. It won't be ideal, but it also won't be the end of the world.

Watching friends who graduated last year struggle trying to find jobs, I know the next few months won't be easy and I know there will probably be times of discouragement, but I also know that I don't go through this alone and that if a church says no to me, that doesn't mean I'm not good enough.

So, for the next few months I'll try not to worry, but to be happy.